15 Characteristics Of A Narcissist Man

15 Traits That Reveal His Secret Narcissism: You Won't Believe #7!

15 Characteristics Of A Narcissist Man

Are you married to a narcissist? Many women find themselves in relationships with narcissistic men without realizing it until deeper into the relationship. Narcissistic husbands can be difficult to spot at first because they often put on a charming, attentive act during the early stages of dating. However, over time, the selfishness, lack of empathy, and need for constant validation that characterize pathological narcissism tend to reveal themselves in hurtful ways.

If you suspect the man you love may have narcissistic traits, there are several key signs to look out for. Here are 15 characteristics that are common among narcissistic husbands:

1. Exaggerated Sense of Self-Importance

One of the hallmarks of narcissistic personality disorder is an inflated sense of self and a preoccupation with having others view them as superior. Narcissists believe they are extra special and can only be understood by other special people. Your husband may display this exaggerated self-importance by bragging about achievements, emphasizing his intelligence, looking down on people he views as inferior, or overstating his talents and capabilities. He is likely to expect special treatment and seek constant admiration from those around him.

2. Preoccupied with Fantasies of Success and Power

Many narcissistic men are preoccupied with fantasies of unlimited success, power, beauty, or ideal love. Your husband may constantly envision himself achieving incredible feats like winning a Nobel Prize, amassing tremendous wealth, or making groundbreaking discoveries. However, his daydreams rarely translate into real accomplishments because of the narcissist's sense of entitlement and lack of motivation for hard work. He prefers to focus on maintaining his inflated self-image rather than completing tasks.

3. Believes He is Unique and Can Only be Understood by Other Special People

In addition to believing he is superior to others, the narcissistic husband will often feel he is so special that only other high-status people can truly understand him. He may describe himself as exceptionally intuitive or creative in a way no one else can match. Your narcissistic spouse will want to associate only with other successful, attractive, or influential people who will reflect positively on his self-image. He may be dismissive of your thoughts and feelings by suggesting you are too conventional to appreciate his uniqueness.

4. Requires Excessive Admiration

A narcissist has a relentless need for admiration and validation from those around him. Your husband will constantly fish for compliments and be hypersensitive to criticism. Simple, everyday conversations will revolve around his desire to impress you and have his ego stroked. He may steer every discussion back to himself, interrupt frequently to remind you of his accomplishments, or sulk and rage if you do not express sufficient awe of his talents and intelligence. The narcissist views your role as bolstering his self-esteem at all times.

15 Characteristics Of A Narcissist Man

5. Sense of Entitlement

In addition to needing constant admiration, the narcissistic husband also expects preferential treatment and automatic compliance with his expectations. He will act entitled to special privileges he believes he deserves simply for existing and will try to exploit others to get them. Your narcissistic spouse may cut lines, break rules, or make unreasonable demands of you and others. He will expect you to go above and beyond to meet his needs without consideration for your own. Any objective criticism or questioning of his excessive expectations will likely provoke rage or contempt.

6. Takes Advantage of Others to Achieve His Own Goals

A narcissist tends to view other people as instruments for him to use to achieve his own goals. Your husband will manipulate, exploit, and disregard people's needs in order to get what he desires. He may charm you in the beginning of the relationship with compliments and gifts, then later disregard your feelings, needs, and concerns. The narcissist may also use guilt trips, threats of abandonment, rage, and other means of coercion to manipulate you into meeting his demands. He shows little genuine interest in your thoughts, feelings, or well-being beyond serving his personal agendas.

7. Lacks Empathy

One of the most disturbing traits narcissists possess is a marked lack of empathy toward others. Your narcissistic spouse will be largely unable to understand your feelings or put himself in your shoes. He may dismiss your pain or humiliation as unimportant should you cry or express hurt from his words or actions. You will often feel ignored, invalidated, or like your feelings don't matter to him. This lack of empathy often contributes to the narcissist being critical, insensitive, and callous. It also makes true emotional intimacy in the relationship impossible.

8. Envious of Others

The narcissist tends to harbor secret envy and resentment toward others who have success, prestige, recognition, or status that he craves but cannot attain himself. Your husband may appear to take pleasure in the accomplishments of others or give compliments, but underneath he frequently feels bitter envy. When someone else gets praise or is in the limelight, he may try to sabotage or discredit them behind their back. The narcissist cannot tolerate other people outshining him and will try to diminish their achievements.

9. Arrogant and Condescending Attitudes

In interactions with others, the narcissistic husband often displays arrogance and a condescending attitude. He believes he is inherently superior, so he talks down to people and criticizes others' perceived flaws, mistakes, or inferiority. Your spouse may patronize waiters, retail clerks, or others he views as beneath him. When arguing with you, he is likely to mock your opinions, dismiss your thoughts as unintelligent, and generally display an air of haughty smugness and disdain. Beware these supercilious, pompous attitudes as signs of unhealthy narcissism.

10. Obsessed with Perfection and Beauty

Many narcissists have a fixation on perfection that stems from their desire to be above reproach. Your husband may obsess over getting the finest luxury goods like cars, watches, clothing and other status symbols. He will also be hyper-critical of your physical appearance and may frequently suggest cosmetic procedures to create an idealized partner that reflects his superior image. The narcissist may disparage your looks, clothing, or behavior that falls short of his lofty standards. His unrelenting criticism of you and others reveals the deep insecurity and sense of inferiority beneath his pretensions.

11. Engages in One-Upmanship

Conversations with a narcissistic spouse often turn into competitions where he has to position himself as the winner. He may frequently steer discussions to topics where he can boast of his knowledge, achievements, wealth, or other sources of superiority. When you share information about yourself, he tries to shift the focus back to himself. Your husband also tends to exaggerate his accomplishments and may even fabricate stories to position himself as impressive. Sharing the spotlight with you or others provokes his insecurity, so he instinctively turns interactions into a contest.

12. Secretly Feels Inferior

Despite his outward grandiosity, the narcissist actually harbors deep feelings of inferiority and fears exposure of his shortcomings. Your husband's bombast and bragging mask a fragile self-esteem that requires constant external validation. Any criticism, failure, or sign of disapproval can provoke rage or plunges into despair. He may harshly devalue those closest to him while compulsively striving for glory and tribute from the outside world. However, no amount of accolades can soothe the narcissist's inner emptiness and insecurity.

13. Obsessed with Appearances Rather than Substance

Unlike genuinely confident people who derive joy from inner growth and nurturing relationships, narcissists are obsessed only with appearances. Your husband may devote excessive time and energy to ensuring he looks attractive, successful, and wealthy to outsiders. But behind closed doors, the relationship lacks real love, intimacy, and caring. The narcissist's focus on showing off a glittering facade drains his capacity for emotional availability, sincerity, or thoughtfulness. His constant attempts to impress others conceal inner shallowness.

14. Detests Vulnerability and Weakness

Expressing vulnerability, admitting imperfections, or exposing weaknesses would shatter the narcissist's inflated self-image. Your husband will go to great lengths to hide faults from others by covering up mistakes, faking strengths, or assigning blame. On the rare occasions he does admit errors or weaknesses, he may demand quick reassurance and praise from you. Your spouse is likely to react with disgust or contempt when you express sadness, insecurity, or other "imperfect" emotions. He may call you pathetic or crazy in moments of fragility.

15. Seeks Control and Dominance

Narcissists crave a sense of power and control over others to protect their grandiose false self. Your husband may seek to micromanage your life, finances, career choices, friendships, and other decisions to bolster his superiority. He will also frequently initiate sex on his terms and show little interest in your desires or boundaries. And because he views you as merely an extension of himself rather than an autonomous person, the narcissist will justify these controlling behaviors. Standing up to his attempts at domination will provoke strong reactions or emotional retaliation.

In summary, the narcissistic husband's extreme selfishness, entitlement, and lack of empathy make maintaining a healthy marriage very challenging. His constant need for validation often drains his spouse’s energy and erodes her self-esteem over time. Looking out for signs of unhealthy narcissism in a partner and seeking help through counseling provides the best chance at improving the relationship. With self-awareness and commitment to change, some narcissistic husbands can learn to manage their narcissistic tendencies. However, in many cases, it may be necessary to leave the relationship for self-preservation.